Confessions From A Girl Who Can’t Do Hair

It’s true, kids …

<—— Can’t do that.

I basically spent my Saturday repinning shit on Pinterest (seriously, are we Pin friends yet … because I’m a pinning maniac, and I’m pinning like I’ve never pinned before). But whilst pinning, I began seeing all these stylish girls with all of these fabulous hair styles and it made me think … holy hell, I can’t do cool hair styles to save my life.

As I type this, I’m rocking a messy bun, but don’t get excited … it is one of those messy buns you wear when you hop out of a quick, non-hair washing shower, not one of those fabulous messy buns you can wear out with over the knee boots, jeans and a blazer. Wanna know why my bun is not fabulous? Because I don’t know HOW to make it fabulous, dammit. It seems so easy, doesn’t it?

It stems from the fact that since I was 13, learning how to make my wild, curly hair poker straight was my main reason for walking to Earth. And here I am, 25 … beyond mastered that skill, actually have the ability to add waves to my hair with my flat-iron … but that’s all she wrote, folks. Should I have spent those years learning how to do cool braids … I just don’t know.

My hair is just always down … because I prefer it like that. Down with a wave, down with a flip, down poker straight … but down … down … down … down … down … down. But I would be a dirty liar if I said I wasn’t envious of the girls who rock fish tail braids, teased out pony tails, french twists … seriously, how do they do it?! Perhaps it is the fact that I’m getting bored with my hair and even when I have it poker straight, I feel the urge to run to the bathroom, flip it upside down and mess it up.

I’m also border line lazy. I literally give myself enough time in the morning to shower, throw on makeup, run a flat iron through my hair, think of a quick outfit and run out the door to make it to work in time. Is it worth getting up 20 minutes earlier so I can sit there and try to figure out how to make my hair uber chic with a side bun or something? And the chances of me getting frustrated and saying screw it and just leaving it down are pretty high. Hmm … the fashion side of me is saying yes but the more dominant side of me that wants to punt my alarm clock when it goes off is saying HELL no.

So if anyone feels compelled to give me hair styling 101 … I would be highly appreciative. Shout out to Pinterest for making me realize how yawn-worthy my hair styles are. Back to pinning I go … I wonder what else I will find out about myself besides the fact that I’m obsessed with sparkly things.

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