Wrinkles?! Cue Soundtrack From Psycho …

So I’ve been on a high-speed roller coaster this week. Stress, anxiety, sadness, happiness, drama, excitement, apprehension, fright … literally all wrapped up in a bow. But I mean, that’s life, right? But especially after my extremely long and fabulous day yesterday (did I mention I went to fashion week, because I did … eee!), which led me to become a bit dehydrated, slightly under fed and massively sleep deprived … I woke up this morning and while trying to make myself look like a functioning human being I noticed my eyes looking a bit … weathered, to say the least.

Did I mention I’m 25? My mother is 65 and literally just looked at herself and said, “oh look, I’m starting to get wrinkles.” What kind of crazytown nonsense is this?! I’m not saying I have wrinkles, or perhaps I’m in denial. My best friend’s worst nightmare has always been getting wrinkles. Even when we were in college she was into anti-aging serums and I thought she was cray-cray.

I relate anti-aging serums to having grand children and wearing dentures. Period, because that is what good old advertising has put into our heads all these years. Now all of a sudden as a woman in her 20’s I need to put this on my Sephora wish list? Really? Beauty wise, we already have so much shit to worry about and purchase, and now this? But seriously, anti-aging serums … the GOOD ones … are insanely expensive. And how do you know what the good ones are. They all claim to smooth skin, fill lines and reduce aging. Where do you begin, I mean for the love.

So what am I going to do? Well, I’m going to take a deep breath because I know I’m still young and probably technically don’t have wrinkles just yet, but I do know I need to be taking better care of my skin so I don’t look like a wrinkled piece of leather my grand children hide in a corner. So it all starts with healthy living. I realize I sometimes don’t take care of myself in the proper way, so in a perfect world, here is what I would do:

1. It all starts with eating healthy. Fruits, veggies … or even trying a raw diet like my good friend is doing, which apparently is making her feel fantastically energized with a clear head. I would literally shank someone if I couldn’t have a carb but it is fun to think about.

2. Water is the best anti-wrinkle treatment you can do. A hydrated body means hydrated skin which means vibrant and beautiful skin.

3. NO Diet Coke. NONE. Diet Coke or diet drinks in general personally make me feel bloated and my face look puffier than it actually is. Just because it’s diet doesn’t mean it’s a loop-hole. Aspartame has some really disgusting side effects that a lot of people don’t know about. Do your research and just say no (advice coming from a recovering Diet Coke addict).

4. Doing yoga a couple of times a week. It will help you center, learn how to breathe your way through tricky situations and make you live in the moment more. It has done wonders for me, the girl who moves a million miles a second.

5. De-stress as much as humanly possible. Stress is the number 1 cause of wrinkles … or at least I believe so, because I’m a doctor and all, so breathe, take one thing at a time and keep everything in perspective. Easier said than done, I know … but give it a whirl … baby steps.

6. Sleep, for the love of God, SLEEP. And if you can’t sleep, knock yourself out with a Benadryl. “Beauty sleep” is a real thing, not just something tools say. Looking well rested is foundation to looking fabulous.

7. Have four drinks instead of eight. Okay, I adore a good cocktail, but you know you look like a house just fell on you when you wake up hung over. I know I do. No matter how much makeup I put on, the death look can not be hidden. So everything in moderation … especially the older we get. Ick.

8. Sunblock. Okay, unfortunately I did some pretty heinous damage to my skin while in my teens because, well, I thought Irish skin could get really tan during one beach day … like an idiot. But luckily a lot of makeup brands have SPF within them, so invest and adapt immediately. No one wants to look like leather one day.

9. Invest in a great face moisturizer. Find one that works for your skin. I would recommend mine, but all skin is a bit different. I do enjoy Neutrogena, but it may take a few tries with different brands to find your bag, baby.

10. Ugh … and finally … purchase a very BASIC and SIMPLE and CHEAP anti-aging serum and slowly work it into your face regiment. Do some research, go to the drug store, and find one that helps prevent wrinkles … not corrects. Don’t break the bank, just get something very subtle for younger people. Use a fake alias if you need to, no one will judge.

One day we will all be really old … so in the meantime we should do everything we can, besides get Botox, to help preserve it.


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