Happy Fourth O’ July!

My sincere apologies for being so MIA. I’ve been feeling under the weather and finally pulled myself out of the dark hole of hell also known as strep throat … or so my quack doc says. But regardless … Happy Fourth of July! I love nothing more in life than watching fireworks … probably because I’m attracted to shiny, colorful things … I digress though.

People are all about Fourth of July fashion this year, and for me I feel like it is only when it isn’t Memorial Day, Fourth of July or Labor Day that I end up looking like the American flag threw up all over me. For example, about three weeks ago (give or take) I ended up going to work looking like the more modest version of Wonder Woman. Yeah … I know, right? I bet you are wondering if I have mirrors in my house, and yes I do … but sometimes in the deep dark hours of the morning … they are dirty dirty liars. But regardless, I ended up rocking an electric blue midi skirt, a fabulous red top and gold cuffs. It wasn’t until I sat down at my desk, enjoying my cup of tea that I let the gold cuff catch my eye and made me think, “holy shit … I’m Wonder Woman.”

But now that it is the Fourth … I’m trying to concoct some sort of patriotic look because gosh darn it I do love me some AMURICA … that’s right, AMURICA … not AMERICA. But for the life of me I feel like everything is too literal and over the top. Navy blue strapless dress with white polka dots and red sandals … I mean I mine as well wear a Statue of Liberty shaped crown on my head … for the love. Perhaps blue jean shorts and a red t-shirt … I mean was I late for the casting of the “Little Pink Houses” video or something … wear are my cowboy boots!? Hell, maybe I’ll just rock the Wonder Woman look again and call it a day … because nothing is more AMURICAN than Wonder Woman.

Eh screw it … I’ll probably end up wearing black and rocking some festive accessories … and not because I don’t love Amurica … but simply because that is how I roll when I’m not feeling 100% healthy. And by accessories I mean a red, white and blue firecracker popsicle in one hand and a red daiquiri in the other.

So from all of us here at Life Sucks in a Strapless Bra, and by everyone I mean yours truly … have a happy and safe Fourth of July. And because I lecture all of you during every big drinking day … ahem: Don’t be idiotic be PATRIOTIC and don’t drink and drive for the LOVE of God. BBQ … drink … pass out and repeat … and do it all at a reasonable hour with designated drivers since most of us have to work tomorrow (thanks holiday Gods … psyche).

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