Ombre Hair

To Ombré Or Not To Ombré … That Is The Question …

It’s about a bazillion degrees outside right now and normally people with long hair like myself would probably be contemplating chopping it all off at this very moment in time, where I am currently contemplating how to reinvent my hair color.

I first dyed my hair when I was 18. Everyone told me not to do it because once you start you can’t stop … but of course I thought that was all hogwash. Only until I saw the ugly roots, faded color and gray hairs pop up is when I finally said to myself, “dammit, NOW I get it.”

So after seven years of dying my hair I have been every shade of brown possible, a red-head (all I wanted was a red tint and I ended up looking like freaking Debra Messing … did I have the balls to tell my hair dresser he ruined me for the end of my senior year in high school… nope), I went through a black hair phase when I thought mixing my own color was a good idea (hello Elvira … it was hot), a cherry chocolate color that rocked in the beginning and then after a few more dyes it started to turn this gothic looking red. I went through a phase in college when my hair looked like a faded, mixed color mess because I was too broke to get it dyed (we’ve all been there), I did the whole highlights thing … and for the past three years or so I’ve been this great rich dark brown color that I’ve been obsessed with. But after three years … I mean come on, I’m bored. Literally yawning at my color as I speak.

Some people self-express through tattoos, interpretive dance, making cupcakes, I mean whatever floats your boat … I personally dye my hair. My next hair color adventure I want to go on … ombre, duh … all the cool kids are doing it. No seriously, I’ve been wanting to do it for months and months and months but resisted temptation because I was in a wedding in May and was scared that I was going to look like a hot tranny mess. Now … I have nothing stopping me. EXCEPT … well, I over think everything and here are my most relevant and recent fears, ahem:

  1. I will look like Kei$ha. Yeah … I love the dark roots and lighter tips look … I really do … but sometimes it can be drastic and dirty looking, which makes me think of Kei$ha … and quite frankly I don’t want to pay $200 to look like I live in a trash can down by the river. I am a lot of things, but trash can chic ain’t one. Seriously, who gave that chick a career?
  2. My hair is pretty dark right now, which means they are going to have the bleach this shit out of it … which equals damage and pain. Ever had bleach touch your scalp? Hurts like a mofo kids… like eyes filling up with tears pain. But beauty is pain … I suppose, or I just need to find a salon that serves booze.
  3. It is expensive as all hell. And quite frankly, it is a pretty specific process and can go wrong real fast … so I should pay top dollar to have it done right and well instead of getting half priced Suzy to do it and have her bleach all of my hair off or something ridiculous like that so I’m left with like two strands of hair to braid.
  4. Going blond scares me. I know I wouldn’t be going all blond, but still. I’m a brunette at heart. Let’s put it this way, if brunettes had a gang, I would probably be the leader and wear lots of leather in a Joan Jett kind of fashion. And I feel by dying my tips blonde … well, I may be losing a part of that. Okay, I’m officially cray-cray, I know. Me as a blonde, weird. Straight. Up. Weird.

So there ya have it. I’m going through something right now where I need a little edge to my hair. I will probably end up doing ombre and then I will have to live in a van down by the river because I will be broke as a joke after it is all said and done … but I have a feeling it will be worth it, at least the adventure aspect of it.

Jessica Biel is my ombre muse (see picture attached) … even though I loathe her face because Justin Timberlake promised to marry me since I was 13 … and she has ruined all of that :::Sigh:::, but I digress. Any comments, criticisms (constructive for the love), or thoughts are welcomed with open arms.

Maybe I do need a little Kei$ha in my life to feed my need for “edge.” And then in a couple of months I can crawl back in my boring brunette hole.

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