Stickin’ It To Abercrombie.

CaptureWhen I was in high school, I wanted to be cool. Like really cool. Like Kelly Kapowski cool. And I thought the way to do that was through trendy clothing that all the cool kids were wearing. Juicy, Hard Tail, Mavi Jeans … and good ol’ Abercrombie & Fitch. Sigh.

So, of course, on my Christmas list to Santa, clothing from Abercrombie was on there. Flash forward to Christmas morning when I’m holding boxes from A&F grinning from ear-to-ear like an idiot and my mom staring at me, shaking her head in disbelief and annoyance.

She then enlightened me to her very first … and last … Abercrombie experience, which I will share with you now, from her perspective, told by me (from what I can recall).

The smell was overwhelming when I first walked in to the point where it was making me nauseous. I kept going though because “Santa” needed to finish her Christmas duties. But it wasn’t just that. It was the music. The awful, horrifyingly loud music. I couldn’t think!

And then I got greeted by some model-looking half wit who is a size negative zero strutting around in A&F. I smiled and started to look around by myself. The funny thing was, there was no light! Just these tiny tea lights around the clothing. Was I looking at a t-shirt or was it a dress, I didn’t have the slightest idea!

So I was forced to ask a sales associate for help. I told the girl that I was looking for an outfit for my daughter, who was tall and skinny with long legs. She said some things but I couldn’t hear her. Her: “What kind of ::muffled noise::: Me: WHAT?! Her: “Does your daughter li … :::muffled noise::: Me: WHAT?! I CAN’T HEAR YOU? I mean I was screaming at this poor girl to get my point across! Once I started reading her lips, we got on the same page.

So she brought me over to the jean skirts, the ones that all the girls wear, apparently. I lifted it up to one of the tea lights and realized this piece of jean they were calling a jean skirt that looked like someone took a lawn mower to it was over $100, and would not even cover her behind. We moved on to t-shirts. She isn’t a large … at all. But when I lifted the medium up, it didn’t even look like it would fit a toddler. Forgive her for having breasts. So I was forced to get a large, which I wasn’t even sure would fit her. Not to mention I couldn’t find a t-shirt that didn’t say ABERCROMBIE all over it to save my life. And because I needed to get the hell out of that store, I was forced to buy an overpriced t-shirt … and the run towards fresh air and silence.

True life: That large t-shirt … didn’t fit me. And you know what, I was 5’9 and in no way, shape or form overweight. But even in their overpriced jeans, I was like a size 15, when normally I was a size 6. Really?

Clothing is supposed to make you feel good, help you express who you truly are, no matter what size you happen to be. You say you hate “fat chicks”, Mike Jeffries? Well I hate discriminatory, macho, close-minded, assholes who make people feel bad about themselves.

So to my mother, I apologize for making you go through this hell when I was a teenager. To normal human beings out there … if a brand makes you feel bad about yourself when they really should be in the business of making everyone feel the best they canΒ  … know that no one has the right to do that … NO ONE. And Mike Jeffries, you make overpriced, unoriginal crap that pushes your brand name. That’s. About. It. Take a look in the mirror and try to find Jesus or something. Men who are CEO’s of a popular clothing company, who put limitations on what kind of human being can wear their brand based on superficial reasons, clearly have something deeper inside they need to work out.

So SUCK ON THAT …. aye aye aye aye aye aye!

AND ONE MORE THING: Just because you have a model stick figure standing to greet me at your store doesn’t make me want to slap “Abercrombie” across my ass. People buy clothing because it makes them feel good and fits well, not because some gorgeous model sold it to them. And if you only buy your clothes based on how the sales associates look … well, God speed in life.



12 thoughts on “Stickin’ It To Abercrombie.

  1. A very long time ago, I worked at the original A&F, which was about as uncool as any store could be. We sold uptight, preppy stuff, which was pretty old ladyish, but I needed a job. The funny thing is, back then all of the clothes were huge. Being petite, I had to roll and tuck everything because we were required to wear the ugly clothes. Maybe the CEO should check out the archives.

  2. Thank you so much for writing this! It is so true and needed to be said. You’re blog is so great, don’t stop writing!

  3. This is awesome! I love your mom’s narrative about her experience – I definitely felt that way when I was in high school too (and an aside – what is with the lights? Who wants to shop in the dark?!). I just wrote about A&F as well this week…I’m really enraged about the whole thing. I think it’s great that people are reacting to this and sharing their stories; my hope is that it will maybe help younger girls understand that just because you don’t fit into A&F clothing doesn’t mean you’re any less of person.

  4. I read This: this morning and I’m glad that people aren’t just accepting what he says as truth. He is rude and close minded.

    However, i was never a child who liked named brand clothing meaning brands who you pay extra money for the name on the front of the shirt instead of the quality and style of the actual item and I wish more people would think this way but the more money a company puts into advertising the better hold they have on the youth.

    -Chrissy of

    1. Hi Chrissy!

      Thanks for your lovely comment! I wish I was like you when I was younger and focused more on the quality of the item instead of the name brand … hmph teenagers. But at the end of the day it is about making our youth feel good about themselves, and we won’t let idiots like Mike Jeffries ruin that, will we!

  5. I’m happy you wrote this. It was great to hear what a poor parent must think of those places, too. A&F was not really big around my area when I was growing up, thankfully. By the time Hollister arrived at our local mall, I did try to fit myself into some of their largest sweatshirts & tees (I could never fit in the jeans). So sad young girls have to go through the agony of not fitting in because a man like Mike Jeffries says so. Ugh.

    1. Hi Emily! Loved your comment! I agree, hopefully young girls know that style standards ARE NOT set by idiots like Mike Jeffries … I think Karl Lagerfeld would agree πŸ™‚

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