Wait … WHAT’S In My Beach Bag!?

mary-poppins-bagLike an idiot, I scheduled my vacation for the end of August. It’s June 12. Sigh … (I know, I know seriously … play the smallest violin in the world for me … I get it). But hey, we are human beings and sometimes, we need a break. And while I adore my career and find myself very thankful for it and could kiss it … I sometimes would prefer to be chillin’ poolside with a margarita. I mean who in their right mind wouldn’t?! Come now …

So when Naja, who sells beautiful and affordable lingerie (if you haven’t checked them out yet … do it), reached out to me asking what I would put in my beach bag, I found this the perfect opportunity to do what I do best: daydream. 

I’m a firm believer that style doesn’t end when sand hits your toes. So behold as in my head I turn my desk to sand, my heels to flip flops, my maxi skirt to a one-piece bathing suit (because a one piece is the new bikini, you heard it here first … trust), my laptop into a frozen cocktail, and my office into an oceanfront view. Join me … won’t you? 

1. You can’t do anything without a great beach bag: Again … style doesn’t end on the beach. A beach bag should be equivalent to your everyday tote … expressive of your personal style and willing and able to hold all of your goods, Mary Poppins-style. And here is one of my faves … boom: 

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2. Hardcore SPF: I don’t fucks with the sun. You know that guy on the beach that has a big hat on under an umbrella with white shit all over his/her nose? Yep, that’s me. It’s not worth it, kids. There are far too many fantastic lotions to give you that sun-kissed look then risk getting skin cancer and or wrinkles laying out in the sun. SPF 50 is my jam. Get on it. 


3. Ear buds: Sure, nothing is like listening to your favorite tunes on the beach … but more importantly, they are for drowning out the potentially annoying people around you. Loud families … kids … teenagers. Woof. Ear buds allow you to escape to your happy place quietly without any irritating background noise. 

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4. Oversized hat: I told you, I don’t play around with the sun anymore. And big, floppy hats are not only great for protecting your face from the harmful rays of the sun … they are also classically stylish. That’s Audrey Hepburn shit right there. 

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5. Shades: Nothing makes me more excited than a good pair of sunglasses. For me, the bigger the better, but I know we all don’t like to hide behind obnoxiously large, Johnny Depp as Willy Wonka-style shades. Listen … I like the pretend the paparazzi is after me at all times for funsies (kind of, not really, but kind of … :::shifty eyes:::)

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6. Wine: Yes, you heard me properly. The beach just isn’t as fun without some cocktails. And I bet you’re wondering, “but Kate, warm wine on the hot beach? Gross!” WRONG, sir, you are, WRONG! After lots of research, I’ve found some sneaky ways to keep your wine bottles cold on the beach, like with insulated bags. It does the same job as an ice pack, except it wraps around your wine bottle in a cute little bag. Umm hello, get into my life.  

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7. Lip balm: The Balm Dotcom has become my jam for my lips. While yes, it is a skin salve, I’ve found it is best for keeping my lips hydrated and smooth. Salt water can do a number to dry out your lips, so best to keep them hydrated. Although, do keep this in a dark, hidden place in your bag, otherwise this shit will turn into hot lava and melt all over the place. 

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8. Extra hair tie: Nothing is worse then when you either A. lose your hair tie in the ocean or B. it breaks and no one around you has one, and you are left with your wild mane of wet hair to forever rest on your hot, exposed shoulders whilst laying on the beach. Always be prepared and have an extra, if not for you, than for your idiot friend who forgot one. 

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9. Trash Mags: OK!, US Weekly … listen, when I’m on vacation, it gives me the opportunity to find out all the shit I don’t really need to know … like what Caitlyn Jenner’s favorite moisturizer is and how many pregnancy pounds Kim Kardashian has gained (which, by the way, I think is heinous … leave the poor girl alone … :::cue LEAVE BRITNEY ALONE, video::::)

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10. Kimono: Last summer I purchased my first beach kimono and I fell in lerve … hard. This summer, I plan to live in them on the beach. When it turns late afternoon, and you find yourself watching the sun set with some cocktails with friends on the beach … nothing works best to cover your swimsuit up than a kimono. (And yes, that is me basking in the glory of my Stevie Nicks-esque kimono below)

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