Farewell, 2014, You Saucy Minx

2e1d779051e837e5239abc550b9c10bcDo you ever feel like you’re in this crazed whirlwind, Tasmanian devil-style, all year and then all of a sudden it stops for a minute on New Year’s Eve, only to pick back up when the ball drops? Because that is kind of where I’m at.

It’s funny, this time last year I was kicking 2013 to the curb in my highest most pointy heels, and now I sit here bidding 2014 adieu with a heavy heart. Every year I do a recap of all my blog posts for the year, and I absolutely saw a theme with my writing in 2014. That was loving yourself and showing your fellow ladies some love, because bullying and encountering “mean girls” doesn’t just stop once you leave the cafeteria, hate to say it. And even though the year is ending, and those posts are going into some weird interwebs archive, those two topics should resonate with you every day in the new year, no matter where you are in life or what age. And don’t you worry, we’ll still be talkin’ it up about it in 2015 … oh yes we will.

Plain and simple, the reason why I adore nurturing this blog so much is because I get to know such interesting people, from designers to store owners, to experts in a certain field, and most importantly, my readers. And this year, holy lord did I get to know such lovely people and even better, I got to share their amazing talents with you. I hope you’ve enjoyed them as much as I did, because in 2015, we are KICKIN’ IT UP A NOTCH, people! 

Listen, you know me, I think it’s totally lame to answer the question, “gee golly, what was your fave moment of 2014!!!?!?!” Welp, kids. I want to say it was getting placed as third best local blogger in the 2014 PHL Philly Hot List (and number one fashion blogger), but I have to say getting the opportunity to have CBS 3 interview me and make Life Sucks In A Strapless Bra sparkle more than it already does was truly a mind blowing way to close out 2014. I don’t have words. I’m not kidding, will someone pinch me, for the love of God?!

Well enough about me. Thank you to everyone who has made this year something special for me and for Life Sucks In A Strapless Bra. Bring in 2015, bring it all, bitch.

Now enjoy my favorite 10 posts. Well 11 because I couldn’t choose, so one for good luck :::wink:::

My Mom Likes Pharrell More Than Me:

http://www.lifesucksinastraplessbra.com/2014/10/14/my-mom-likes-pharrell-more-than-me/

Century 21 Words Of Wisdom:

http://www.lifesucksinastraplessbra.com/2014/10/22/century-21-philly-words-of-wisdom/

Be Kind:

http://www.lifesucksinastraplessbra.com/2014/08/12/be-kind/

Adult Temper Tantrums:

http://www.lifesucksinastraplessbra.com/2014/07/16/adult-temper-tantrums/

Style Stud: Smak Parlour:

http://www.lifesucksinastraplessbra.com/2014/02/14/style-stud-smak-parlour/

Bringing Back The One Piece:

http://www.lifesucksinastraplessbra.com/2014/07/29/bringing-back-the-one-piece/

Down With Plus Size:

http://www.lifesucksinastraplessbra.com/2014/07/31/down-with-plus-size/

Let Me Let Me Bra-Ducate Yah:

http://www.lifesucksinastraplessbra.com/2014/03/26/let-me-let-me-bra-ducate-yah/

Phantom Hair Syndrome:

http://www.lifesucksinastraplessbra.com/2014/03/21/phantom-hair-syndrome/

I Swear I’m Not Goth:

http://www.lifesucksinastraplessbra.com/2014/06/30/i-swear-im-not-goth/

My First Pair Of Kicks In 11 Years:

http://www.lifesucksinastraplessbra.com/2014/05/14/my-first-pair-of-kicks-in-11-years/

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My New Year’s Lesson

caraburgerWhile people were busy making resolutions and dousing themselves in as much glitter and sequins as possible, I found myself learning a very valuable lesson this New Year’s Eve.

Now in typical NYE fashion, I had not the slightest idea of what I wanted to wear. Call it growing up, if you must, but I’m over slipping into a barely there dress, applying a smokey eye and freezing my balls off for the remainder of the evening because I clearly didn’t have the time of day for stockings. I was dreaming of a NYE that consisted of all of the same things … drinking, beings with loved ones, having an amazing time … accept in my jeans and flannel button down. But alas, this wasn’t an option.

So back to my three outfit options. One was a skin tight black dress that required SPANX, which suffocate me. The other was a bit of an outlandish look … plaid shorts over stockings (SPANX stockings), a regular T-shirt tucked in to said shorts, with a fantastic vintage sequin cardigan that makes my knees weak I adore it so much. And finally, black high-waisted leather pencil skirt with a black crop top, with … yes you guessed it, SPANX stockings. So what to wear, what to wear?

Carbs. Carbs are probably one of the most important assets of NYE. If you think they aren’t, you are a fool. Carbing up before drinking is key, otherwise you will drop before the ball. Now I’m not one of these girls who is like, “I’ll have a Saltine … yep, I’m full, tee hee.” Nope. I have an obsession with potatoes and I can safely say if I gave up carbs I would turn into the Incredible Hulk and start killing people. Just sayin’.

So, before I got ready, I decided to eat a hamburger, BUT I ordered it off the kids menu thinking it would be smaller. Wrong. It was massive. And delicious. And I ate every single drop of it. Both buns. And all the fries. And it was glorious. My mouth is watering just thinking about it. Mmm burger. I was in heaven … who wouldn’t be in heaven eating a delicious burger in an oversized robe. Oh that’s right, someone that would have to take off said robe and squeeze themselves into a tight ass dress.

So my valuable lesson I learned, readers, is this: Don’t. Eat. A massive burger. Before. Putting. On. SPANX. Just don’t do it. Don’t even think about it. Maybe give yourself like two hours in between the burger eating and the SPANX wearing. Yes carbs are SO important before a night of drinking, BUT … a full stomach sucked into suffocating SPANX and tight garments equals a God damn nightmare.

I was miserable. I was so full and felt so gross that not even SPANX could give me the illusion that I looked good. I had to pop another bottle of champagne to stop looking in the mirror and sighing in shame. Alas, I did this to myself.

But God dammit that burger was fantastic. Lesson learned.