My Closet Issues

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I’m the type of gal who likes everything in one place. I don’t understand the people that have a shoe closet and a coat closet and a sweater closet and a closet for God knows what else. I likes it all where I can sees it. That is until I moved to a place that was clearly built before women were plagued with shopping addictions. One dress. One petticoat. One corset. Literally my “closet” is a hole. A small, dark hole that can’t come close to holding what I need. Hence why I adopted a garment rack, which has become my best friend. I feel like Kim Kardashian or some shit … minus all the designer clothes, and the big ass. But I digress.

Going back to how I like everything in one place, I was never a person who put all my winter gear in a Tupperware box in the basement and switched it out for my summer gear. My theory is clothing doesn’t belong in Tupperware boxes or in “space saving bags” in a basement. How sad, right? My clothing is like my children. Would I put my children in the basement when the weather changed. Umm no … I’m not a psychopath. And wonder if in the middle of winter we get a heat wave and I need a cool t-shirt or something? Nope. Can’t have it. It’s in the Tupperware box never to return again until Memorial Day :::shakes fist:::. Whomp whomp. Screw that.

Unfortunately, due to my clothing addiction, I’m running out of space. Even on my Kim K garment rack. And since I thoroughly don’t believe in Tupperware (with my clothing or with food … it’s skeevy and weird), I’ve resorted to turning my dark hole closet into my “winter gear” storage (I had to give it a nice home), and then kept my spring/summer/things that are typically for warmer weather but I might be able to make them work in the warmer months on the garment rack. Yet … I still find myself having a space issue (I told you, I have a really bad clothing addiction).

I’ve literally forgotten about pieces of clothing I own, strictly because they are so cramped together. Which is a curse and a blessing because when I come across something I forgot I had … it’s like God damn Christmas morning. And then makes me feel silly because I’ve realized I’ve been buying similar garments over and over again (I swear I’m not crazy, I just likes what I likes).

I’ve found myself wondering if I should have a method to my madness. I’ve always rolled my eyes at people who color-coded their closets or alphabetized their closets, but maybe it makes a different. Oddly enough, the whole thing freaks me out. People can get SO intense with it … and I’m just not type of gal. And … ps. I loathe change. “From right to left you will find my sleeveless dresses, maxi dresses, formal dresses, which then transitions to t-shirts, fancy t-shirts, embroidered t-shirts. Oh and everything is color-coded in alphabetical order based on color.” :::Bangs head against wall::: I mean … no. Just no. The idea of it makes me sweat.

But for someone like me who likes having a bit of chaos in my life, I’ve decided the best way to organize my closet overload is to do it strictly by the following system: Dresses, tanks, t-shirts, long sleeves, jackets, and pants. Boom. And in my dark hole of my closet will live the bulky sweaters and coats that will have a comfortable rest until the cooler months return. This way, when I’m madly rushing to get out the door in the morning, and don’t have the slightest idea what I want to wear, I will easily be able to pull exactly what I want and not have anymore “Christmas morning” moment (although they are delicious) or a Clueless moment screaming, “WHERE IS MY COLLARLESS SHIRT FROM FRED SEGAL!”

I’m excited about this decision. I call this growing up, people, I call this growing up.

How do you organize your closet?

Closet Space: Let Me, Let Me Downgrade ‘Cha

Moving. :::Sigh::: People tell you how heinous it is, but you really don’t know until you make 15 trips to get your closet from your car to your room … upstairs. In other news, my side abs are looking FANTASTIC. But yes, if you don’t stalk me on social media, then you’ve missed all of my fantastical ranting and raving about this epic move that owned my life for the past two-three weeks. But it is over. I am through with the moving conversation.

oldclosetAnd yes, I did get emotional when saying goodbye to my old closet, pictured to the left. It wasn’t like Real Housewives status or anything, but it fit my wardrobe perfectly and I Pinterested it before Pinterest was “Pinterest” by ripping the doors off and adding sheers. I couldn’t help but run my fingers one last time through the sheers as Boys to Men’s, “It’s So Hard To Say Goodbye to YesterdayHEEEE,” played in my head.

That song quickly turned into, “Movin’ on Up” as I went to place my clothing in their new home, when … wait, what :::record screeches:::? Yep. Meet my new closet I’ve deemed “the hole.” Honestly … who can work with something like this?! I am a visual person. When thinking of outfit options, I like all of them staring right back at me so I can say, “Hey guy, I’m going to wear you today with this other guy” (yes I talk to my clothes, don’t you?)

So I had two options: 1. Throw my clothes on the floor and roll around in them crying screaming, “WHY?! WHY ME, LORD?!?!” or 2. Get creative.

To everyone’s shock and awe, I chose the later.

1. I became one with my space: I figured out where my furniture would fit best (and look best) in order to get an idea of how much space I was workin’ with and what storage option would work well with it. It also forced me to get all of my shit in order, otherwise I would be the girl who lived out of boxes.

2. I embraced storage options: I never understood “The Container Store” or people who were obsessed with it. Seemed like overpriced plastic nonsense for organizational freaks to me. Now I know … they are women who lack closet space. After realizing a rolling rack is what would fill my space void … I started researching Walmart, the Container Store, IKEA, Amazon … and numerous other random sites for the perfect one.

3. I got Pinterested: Not only did I need more space for my clothes … I needed it to look chic. This is my room, the expression of who I am, for the love of Jesus. I’ve worked tirelessly to create an oasis for myself and I wouldn’t have it ruined by an obtrusive piece of furniture that i just had to buy for the sake of storage. Eff that … aesthetics comes first. I therefore turned to Pinterest for creative options from shelving to rolling racks. I’m telling you, if you ever have a creative roadblock from style to home decor to world peace issues … Pinterest will save the day … I swear.

4. I became okay with failing: In this process, you need to know that your first attempt at storage solutions … won’t work. The storage Gods don’t play that way, homie. You will need to move furniture, reorganize, move furniture again. Shit will break and it will lead you to drink. You’ll buy one rolling rack, replace it for another, and drink some more. Or (like I did), make your mom tradesies with you for the perfect rolling rack fit.

5. I found rolling rack Jesus: Once you find the perfect storage solution … this overwhelming sense of peace takes over your body. No I’m serious, it is like an outer body experience … you just feel … soothed. Calm. Heavenly. No I’m CLEARLY not that much of a storage psychopath … but it was a vibrant sense of completeness when I turned my storage nightmare into this Pinterest-worthy creation. BOOM. Not only do I get to showcase all my fantastic pieces, but the rack works with the rest of my furniture, AND there is still so much room for ACTIVITIES!

The Finished Product: