Let’s Give Thanks, Shall We?

Screen Shot 2015-11-25 at 10.07.28 AMLast week I had a bit of a throwback moment where I got to color in a printed out piece of fruit and write what I’m thankful for inside of it … yes like we once did in preschool. Oddly enough it was insanely cathartic.

While I can’t supply you with printed out pieces of fruit due to the fact that I’m just not that tech savvy, I would like to bore you to death and share a few things that I’m thankful for since I’m feeling extra EXTRA thankful this year. No clue why, I just am. 

But don’t let my lack of tech knowledge stop you from getting creative and sharing what you’re thankful for, though. Put it out into the universe. Shout it from the social rooftops. Or just tell me, because I’m nosey and want to know, dammit. 

So with all of that being said, wishing all of my fantastic readers a very happy and carbolicious Thanksgiving.

1. Life Sucking In A Strapless Bra: if strapless bras weren’t the worst thing on the planet, I wouldn’t have so much joy in my life right now


2. My family: I mean … duh … 

3. My work family: they are awesome and I’m so lucky to be apart of such a supportive and caring bunch of weirdos.

4. My cats: I just couldn’t imagine my life without them. OMG am I crying?! 

Screen Shot 2015-11-25 at 9.56.53 AM

5. My friends: you know who you are, and as much as I want to go old school “AOL profile” and list the select few of you that I adore, I’m an adult and that is weird. So you know who you are and all I can say is I can’t live … if livin’ is without you.


6. Carbs and wine: Let’s make out later, kay?


7. My career: this past year, especially through all the bullshit and really tough ups and downs, at this moment I can’t help but say “pinch me.” I’m so blessed for all of my opportunities and the people who have helped me get to where I am today. For real … this one may make me shed a tear. 


8. My mom: I know, I know, I already said family, but I’m especially obsessed with my mother. She’s way more stylish than I will ever be and is pretty much the best human I know, inside and out. 

<This is the picture I would post of her if I knew she wouldn’t cut me>

9. My health: because I would feel like an asshole if I didn’t say that.

10. Tina Fey: … because she’s my spirit animal and mentor, except she doesn’t know it or know me. But it’s cool, Tina, we’ll catch up soon. You have my number, right? Cool? No? You don’t want it … aye yes. Right.

30 ROCK -- "The Beginning of the End" Episode 701 -- Pictured: Tina Fey as Liz Lemon -- (Photo by: Ali Goldstein/NBC/NBCU Photo Bank via Getty Images)
30 ROCK — “The Beginning of the End” Episode 701 — Pictured: Tina Fey as Liz Lemon — (Photo by: Ali Goldstein/NBC/NBCU Photo Bank via Getty Images)

Public Service Announcement: Don’t be a fucking idiot and drink and drive tonight. In fact stay home. It’s the amateur hour of drinking. So unless you want some poor bastard who never ever drinks, but decided to get his swerve on and down some kamikaze’s to end up vomiting all over you, I say stay home. 

It’s Never Too Late …

 … to throw up ya thanks!

I was traveling for work over Thanksgiving … therefore I was unable to write a dedicated post to celebrate or have Thanksgiving dinner with my family. So tonight my dear readers … I shall have faux-Thanksgiving dinner AND share my somewhat outdated thoughts on Thanksgiving with you … ahem.

I have a lot to be thankful for this year … and quite frankly I won’t bore you with the list because let’s be honest, no one enjoys reading/hearing people use “what I’m thankful for” as an excuse to brag about their “fab” lives. I’m on to you people.

What I AM most thankful for right now is the fact that I get to nurture, love, expand and respond to all the glory that is Life Sucks In A Strapless Bra. It’s my special little guy. I love in the beginning of the year my goal was to at least get 50 readers a day and now have sometimes over 300. I know for you big time bad ass blog writers that is chump change, but for me it makes me so happy that I end up doing the Carlton dance from Fresh Prince of Bel Air. And I love that when I write a piece, even if I think it is shittastic, you guys still leave me really loving, funny and intriguing comments that make me glow.

Honestly, the concept of “motherhood” never sounded appealing to me. I never really felt like I had a “Mom” bone in my body. But working hard and getting to see Life Sucks In A Strapless Bra grow for the past (almost) two years and continue to grow is more satisfying that I could have ever imagined. So it makes me think … could I one day be a mother … …. ….


One thing at a time people … for the love of Jesus. So from all of us here at Life Sucks In A Strapless Bra … and by everyone I mean yours truly, I hope you all had a lovely Thanksgiving! And know that I’m very thankful for ever single one of my bad ass readers!

And remember … it is all about the things in life that make you glow!

My Thankfulness Runneth Over

First of all, Happy Thanksgiving to all of my fantastic readers. I have to say, besides my lovely family and friends that I am lucky enough to have in my life, I would say the next thing I am most thankful for would be this blog and the fantastic response I have been getting from all of you.

To get super sappy for a moment (I know, I know, I promise this will only take a second), this blog has been something I have wanted to do for years and years and years. And finally to make my vision a reality and have the opportunity to nurture it and watch it grow over these past few moments has been so fulfilling, overwhelming, emotional and so beyond my wildest dreams and expectations that I literally don’t even have a word for it … therefore I will call the whole experience SCRUMTRILSCENT!

Whew, I told you that blast of emotion would only take a second. Any who, to all of you who read along, comment, ‘LIKE’ me on Facebook, tell your friends and fam to read the Life Sucks In A Strapless Bra gospel, I just wanted to say how you guys rock beyond belief.


In other news, here is what my day will consist of: Shower, dress extremely casual, figure out the appropriate time to have my first glass of wine, start noshing, hang out with the fam, “cook,” aka try to have my mom teach me how to cook from me watching her from the kitchen table, eat some more, continue drinking, have a proper Thanksgiving dinner with my fam, drown in a food comma on my couch, watch a Very Gaga Thanksgiving (so pumped) and probably fall asleep … if all goes according to plan.

Things I will not be doing: Taking advantage of door busted deals at 12 a.m. … more to come on that later though.

Have a very happy, safe, fulfilling, joyous, drunken, food coma worthy Thanksgiving from Life Sucks In A Strapless Bra! And feel free to comment on what you find yourself being the most thankful for (no judgement if it is fashion related, aka if you scored a piece of Versace for H&M … brag away.)

More Turkey, Less Shopping

thanksgiving-ann-sheridan-thecarveI’ve never understood the people who looked forward to the Black Friday madness. My first job was at Burlington Coat Factory when I was 16, and I remember having to work in the “coat department” on Black Friday, and quitting the next day.

Over the years, Black Friday has been taking steroids, my friends, to the point where it is now allowing stores to be opened ON Thanksgiving. I get the family traditions of eating dinner then taking a little cat nap, then heading out for the best deals at midnight … kind of. It’s cute, it’s tradition. Whatever. My family was too busy being in food comas and figuring out if one more piece of pie would push us over the edge to give a shit about awesome deals.

But what I don’t think people understand is that it takes human beings to open slash run these stores on Thanksgiving. People that have to deal with your crazy ass stampedes and tantrums and disgusting fights to get the best flat screen deal in the whole entire universe (which ps, it probably isn’t … shhh). People that either don’t get to spend Thanksgiving with their families, or have to leave mid-chocolate cream pie bite (my go-to Thanksgiving dessert) to head out to work. And you know what, that straight up sucks. To ask these people to for-go eating turkey for fear of a tryptophan coma that could inhibit their work is just cruel.

I’m starting a blog slow clap for Massachusetts, Maine and Rhode Island for establishing laws that tell retailers they absolutely cannot open on Thanksgiving and to shut their greedy mouths. Why can’t we be more like these states, other states, huh? And let’s include Nordstrom in this slow clap, because they, too are closed on Thanksgiving, AND not only that, but they premiere their store holiday decorations ON Black Friday. Not like in the death rattle of Halloween like some stores. I personally only consider it “the holidays” after I’ve digested my turkey and it is officially 12am on Black Friday. So to wake up to a beautifully decorated store on Black Friday, which Nordstrom knocks out of the park every year, I gotta say is a breath of fresh air.

Do you know there are ACTUAL malls fining stores for not opening on Thanksgiving. It’s called “Walden Galleria” in upstate New York, and I imagine it to look like this:


Talk about Thanksgiving-branded Scrooge. Macy’s, an American establishment, a way of life for fashion, is one of these horrid stores opening on Thanksgiving, which thoroughly shocked me. There’s no “magic of giving” in that way of life, Macy’s. Just sayin’.

I get it, a good sale is a good sale. I am the first one to throw up an amazing deal I scored all over social media. But I refuse to stand behind any retailer opening on Thanksgiving, refuse, and I hope you stand with me on this. Guess what kids, it ain’t like the old days where retailers save their mind blowing, Oprah-favorite-things audience member mind-blowing sales for just Black Friday. There’s a thing called Cyber Monday, and, oh yeah, genius discount sites that have amazing deals all-day, err-day. And, oh yeah, retailers are SO desperate for your money that they have awesome sales ALL throughout the holiday. So chill the fuck out.

Listen, Thanksgiving is about eating way too much, drinking copious amounts of wine, being with your loved ones, and being thankful for the life you lead, no matter what kind of life that is. Not to go ape shit over $5 t-shirts at Old Navy. I mean come on, it’s gross. You HAVE to admit. So slow your roll, eat ya turkey, and the deals will be there bright and early on Black Friday morning with all of the other crazy bastards out shopping.