Tag: anxiety

Hi, I’m Anxious

.Reading time 4 minutes.

Anxiety-is-my-friendI won’t sugar coat this and I’m not looking for “aww’s” or sympathy … I swear. I’ll smack you if I hear an, “aww.” But since as long as I can remember I’ve been dealing with pretty bad anxiety. It’s not constant, but when it shows its ugly fucking face, it’s just the worst. That is the only way I can describe it. 

Seriously, I see “aww’s” about to come out of your mouth, and I swear I will smack you.

I’m sharing this with you because I am currently infuriated by an article about Kourtney Kardashian (I know, I know … but I have a point AND she is clearly the best Kardashian, right?) and how she is dealing with her anxiety issues. Apparently, her working out and taking scantily clad selfies showing off her smokin’ bod, “may not be portraying the healthiest message to her fans and followers.” 

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There are a lot of awful symptoms that come along with anxiety and everyone deals with them differently. Sometimes I feel like I have an elephant sitting on my chest. Other times I have this insane urge to run for my bedroom as fast as I can and hide under the covers forever. How do I deal with all that? Well … sometimes, not always, like the other night when I was feeling exceptionally anxious, I ate shoe string fries in my pajamas while talking with my mother. While that isn’t my only solution for my anxiety, it sure was soothing (and delicious). 

But another side effect is lack of appetite (this is not a problem I have, I luckily gorge myself on carbs), which Kourtney admitted that she had been dealing with, but is fully focused on staying healthy. So tell me how her throwing herself into her fitness and health and showing off her hot bod is “portraying an unhealthy image” for her fans? 

For anyone who deals with anxiety (which, it’s more than you think), no one would wish this shit on their worst enemy. So I highly doubt she’s like, “hey kids, start stressing yourself out and getting real nervous to the point where you want to cry every other second and not eat anything ever, and you TOO can have a hawt body like me!” I mean … come now. 

Whether you deal with your anxiety issues with medicine, working out, coloring, or eating delicious french fries whilst in your pajamas, like yours truly … at the end of the day it’s no ones damn business but your own. Know that. 

But in the same breath, be healthy about it. Who knows if what Kourtney is saying is complete and utter hogwash. Quite frankly it doesn’t matter. What matters is she is bringing a very important topic to the table by allowing anxiety sufferers to be open about their issues … and I think that is an awesome thing. Because sometimes it’s hard and doesn’t feel right to tell the ones around you what’s really happening inside. 

I will salute Kourtney Kardashian for making it okay to talk about the so-called,“elephant on my chest,” because sometimes just talking about it helps. So be proud of the things you’ve found to soothe your anxiety. Kourtney has her fitness. I have my shoe string french fries (did I mention I was dipping them in spicy hot mustard … because I was and it was glorious).

*From one anxiety sufferer to another, feel free to privately share your story with me or how you treat your moments of anxiety. 

My Self Diagnosed Shopper’s Remorse

.Reading time 5 minutes.

Buyers-RemorseI love clothes and accessories. I luhve um. I luhve um. I LUHVE um :::kicks leg up in the air::: What lady doesn’t? If I could take home everything I try on and lust after, I would. But alas, :::sigh::: … I would be living in a van down by the river.

You know those commercials for diseases or illnesses on TV? “Do you feel tired? Weak? Like you can’t get out of bed? Take :::fill in name of drug here::: for relief! Side effects may include bleeding from the eyes, toes, and finger nails. See your doctor for any complications.” I would love to make a PSA or something for a little thing that I’m personally plagued with known as “Shopper’s Remorse.”

“Do you love shopping? Do you lust after clothes :::showing a girl getting excited over a new blouse, and giving a cashier her credit card, jumps in mid-air in excitement over purchase::: But after you purchase the item, does the price tag make you filled with fear? Anxiety? Self-loathing? :::shows girl scratching her head curled up in the fetal position with visible signs of anxiety::: Then you may be suffering from Shopper’s Remorse. But with this quick pill, you will no longer feel anything but happiness over your new purchases! Side effects include skin tone changing to green, balding, and extreme rage.

Yeah, if only there was a pill for Shopper’s Remorse. I would be a happier, less stressed out person. Yes, I would even risk the side effects of becoming the Incredible Hulk. Because most times when I shop, no matter if I scored an amazing deal, or just broke the bank, I will leave that store freaking out over how much money I spent. It’s insane. I’m a crazy person, I know. “Did I spend too much money? I totally spent too much money. OMG I’m broke. Wait, no I’m not. But I should return this shit, I don’t need it. But I love it. I just won’t buy lunch this week.” AHHH.

For example, once I was roaming through Nordstrom Rack and found Marc by Marc handbag, that was gorgeous, marked down to like $80. When I stopped thinking I was getting punk’d, or that the handbag had a string attached to it and if I attempted to pick it up, someone would move it, I think I texted everyone in my contacts list asking if I should buy this bag. Now yes, $80 is a good chunk of change. BUT the original price of the bag was like $400 (it was a refurbished bag, meaning someone bought it and returned it, and there was NOTHING wrong with it … it was gold). Any normal human soul would have already been home with it, stroking it and doing a happy dance. Me, well, I was sweating, pacing back and forth, waiting for my friends and family to text me back to tell me to purchase the handbag … dumbass. I did. Thank Jesus. But not without being PLAGUED with Shopper’s Remorse.

Hell, I get Shopper’s Remorse when I buy two pairs of sandals from Forever 21. FOREVER. 21. What. Is. Wrong. With. Me. It happens almost every time I shop. Sure, some may say I’m cost conscious and concerned about my spending, but that isn’t it. I think apart of me just hates spending money. OH-EM-GEE, am I cheap?!

Regardless, if you suffer from Shopper’s Remorse, I feel your pain. We can curl up in the fetal position and drool all over ourselves until anxiety consumes our entire bodies together … but at least we’ll have fantastic style, am I right? UP TOP!